RADIANT BEAMS by Fay Chang

Radiant Beams

by Fay Chang

Our God who art here and now, hallowed be thy name. Thy loving kindness come; thy tender mercies be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily health and forgive us our anxieties as we forgive that which causes our anxieties. And lead us not into disease but deliver us from destruction. For thine is the love and the joy and the peace forever. Amen

Packed with gentle silence, the parish hall exuded the God-likeness of the attendees: thirty-six women and four men. We had come to share in centering prayer to be played out in three periods of twenty minutes of silence each. In between those seated sessions, we quietly walked about indoors and out, observed and lit candles, considered photos and words celebrating the theme of Sacred Darkness and Light. One hymn especially amplified this theme:

Holy Darkness, blessed night

Heaven's answer, hidden from our sight.

Chris and Sue Hagen alternately read scriptures and played meditative music. Absent from her usual facilitator role was Evie McGreevy who had just begun her chemotherapy. Even then she had meticulously prepared the program offered by the Contemplative Outreach of North San Diego County.

This half-day 2009 midsummer retreat held at St. Thomas More Church in Oceanside included a liturgical dance by Elena Andrews. Her movements poetically mimed the sadness of crouching in darkness and then the joy of opening to the light. The centerpiece displayed on the floor was a quilt of radiating batik pieces in colors ranging from somber to bright from the center to the borders. We were asked to picture some form of light like a star shining above and around the quilt. I pictured a constellation of holy lights emanating from each participant.

In my usual navigationally challenged manner, I got lost driving to this retreat. I circumnavigated the hills of Vista for twenty minutes. Then because of insomnia the night before, I fell asleep during each of the prayer periods. With only momentary doubt, I decided that relaxation was part of the blessing. Toward the end of the morning, as I struggled to open a plastic bottle of water, the gentleman sitting next to me extended his hand for the bottle and twisted the cap. I was struck with the simplicity of the act. Yet it resonated with these words from Matthew 25:35:

I was thirsty and you gave me drink.

The ambiance at this retreat is best described by Isaiah 30:15:

In returning and rest you shall be saved;

In quietness and in trust shall be your strength.